*lookie lookie

what I got for Christmas!! My new baby! A Canon Digital EOS Rebel XS with the EF-S 18-55 IS Kit.
OMG is right!
I have honestly had a photo of this camera under my desk for 3 years! I've wanted this camera so bad! I am so grateful to the people in my life who have made it possible for me to finally own this camera, and deeply grateful to aunt Kelly (Engbarth) who, like me, believes that passion and dreams can and will come true.
:-) Yay!

I'm right on top of that Rose...

For far too long now (like, since I was in high school) I've always said to my mother "I'm right on top of that Rose" (btw my momma's name is Rosalie). You might be familiar with the phrase, coming from the movie 'Don't Tell Mom the Babysitter's Dead' (which I was never aloud to watch as a kid, but somehow manged to without my parent's knowledge). Anywho... after many years of my answering this to my mother, she began saying it... All The Time! It's become quite the little joke with us, and what makes it totally that much funnier, is that my mom has Never seen the movie! So, for her (25+25)+x birthday, we gave her the movie. Now she can watch it... and totally 'Get It'! :-)

*flamingo

Most recently, I've had this total fixation with flamingos. They are such a beautiful and delicate (and Pink) birds. I've always had a special place in my heart for them, and I know why. My aunt (my only aunt on my father's side) has a love for them as well. She collected things flamingo-ish and had them all over her totally-rad 80s decorated house. I think that my recent *adoration for them is linked up to the feelings I've been having, missing her and wishing she was still here, wondering why I didn't get enough time with her, didn't get to know her as an adult person and not just my aunt karen. She's been gone a little over 10 years now, and with my daughter being her namesake, I just wish my aunt could have met my kids, watched me grow into adulthood, been at the other end of a phone call for advice. The holidays always make you miss those loved ones just a bit more. So I suppose, the flamingo God*wink going on right now is just my way of acknowledging my feelings, and letting them be. I'm thankful for flamingos.

P.S. Happy (25+25)+x Birthday Momma! I love you! "I'm right on top of that Rose..." (story to come later)

Finally*a place for us...

List-A-Holics! --------> MY Listology

where have You been???

Ugh! I've missed you so... don't ever stay away that long ever ever again.

...okay, I am sorry. I have been a bad Bad blogger. But! I have good reason...

Yesterday I was released from the joke of a hospital (John C Lincoln) after my stay of, oh, 4 nights and 5 days!

Truth be told, this is (I know) not the most flatterin of photos but "A" my mom took it from a camera phone and "B" I was in a lot - A Lot - A LOT of pain (to be control thereafter by Morphine... thank God for the miracle of medicine).

Anyway... the long story short goes sumpthin' like this... went in Sunday afternoon (11/30) after pain in my lower abdomen was so excruciatingly painful that I was literally moments from passing out from the pain (let me note now that I have a very high pain tolerence earning a mother-of-the-year nomination for giving birth to my 9lbs 2oz son with no pain meds).

Continuing... in the ER for 7-ish hours, my CT scan showed fluid, blood and debris in the lower abdomen and nobody could tell us what it was from. So, I was admitted. I'm not going to bore you with the absolute frustrations that I went through when I was in the hospital for 33 HOURS before I was able to see a doctor let alone get any food or water (not even so much as water or ice chips). Grrrrr.... breathe.

Okay, so after pelvic exams and ultrasounds, an endoscopy, and tons and tons of bloodwork, they still don't have an exact answer as to what is exactly wrong with me. I was begging to be released because the entire experience was not only physically painful, but truly exhausting on my mother, my husband, and myself. Dealing with incompetency is not something I do well.

As for now, I have been seen by my own Gyn and am scheduled for a Pelvic MRI Monday (12/8). From what she can tell, it could very well have been a massive ovarian cyst rupture (mind you, I have had several of these before but nothing this painful). I am to stay off my feet all weekend and rest. My body is tired, and I can feel it trying to heal itself. I hope answers are soon to come.

Also, one more thing...

Wednesday, December 3, 2008 my very dear friend Sharon Howell (shown below with me in many photos... she has long blonde hair) lost her father. Brad Howell was just like all of our dads and he will with certainty be loved and missed.

i'm baaaack....

*warning... picture overload!!

We had an amazing time in Puerto Vallarta! The resort was first class, all the way. Aside from getting (what I'm told is) Montezuma's Revenge, I enjoyed every day, down at the beautiful pools, or on the warm sandy beach (gosh, I miss the beach So Much). The staff was there to get you anything you wanted (another cocktail, some food, a towel, what-have-you) at a moment's notice. Our one and only outing together was zip-lining and rappelling in the jungle... that was an adventurous day, I enjoyed it So Much! Paul went out on a 'guys trip' deep sea fishing and caught a record size 58 inch Dorado (mahi-mahi), while I spent my day at the spa having a facial and massage (I know... life is rough). hehe.

We came home and immediate got off the plane and walked right into rehersal dinner for our cousin's wedding (which I was a bridesmaid in). The wedding was Saturday (we came home Thursday) and I am just now getting around to catching up.

Paul's birthday is tomorrow... and since he is leaving to go hunting Thanksgiving Day morning, we are decorating for Christmas this weekend (tis the season, hehe).

Peace and Love.

less than 48 hours....

...until we go HERE!

when soneone close disappoints you...

Sadness.., originally uploaded by WomanNchns.

it leaves you with a deep sadness that nobody can repair but the one who caused it.

*flashback friday

8th Grade Valentine's Day Dance (circa 1994)

l2r: Stephanie Abeyta, Adina Gutierrez, Me (check out the bangs), Liz Kaucher

who doesn't just LOVE a *Sale!!!

so... the lovely and super-amazing-talented Leigh-Ann is having (get this)

50% off EVERYTHING in her shop Freckled Nest.

So, if you're into handmade and indie-art, seriously... this lady has the most amazing stuff!! Fun stuff, mind you! And she is just too stinkin' adorable! Love ya LA!!

its *wednesday...

and I am just now, *finally recovering from Saturday Night's activities! My cousin (in-law... Paul's cousin) is getting married November 15th. For her *girls in the wedding party, instead of buying us jewelry, she decided to have a Pole Dancing Class from Pole Divas. I have to say, I had tons and tons and tons of fun (after the inital 'no-way-am-I-getting-my-big-'ol-self-up-there' mentality... btw, thank goodness for tequila rose! hehe). Anyway, having a small-but-distinct background of cheerleading and dance, I was all for it! Um, yeah.... can I just tell you that I could run every day for an hour, for an entire year, and *still not get the workout I did on that pole! Believe me, it was more workout than sexual (although, we did learn a few 'nice-girl' stripper moves), but it was a TON-OF-FUN and I can't wait to go to a class or host my own party (after running every day an hour a day... hehe! I gotta work up that cardio!!!)

also...

on my mind lately... i've been going through some 'troubling times'. with Daddy going through cancer, and my sister getting a divorce, life has been a wee-bit stressful. so I've been trying to find things to inspire (or occupy) my mind. I have to say, that Kadi and Bridget (two gals I've known since HS) have been *such an inspiration to me, in more ways than one. I don't know if it is because I know them, but Kadi's humor and candidness (i may have made that word up) about life, children, life, marriage, life, people, life, medication, and life, along with her honesty really put things into a (sometimes altered, hehe) perspective that I truly need, and make the day enjoyable. Bridget is a girl I have always had *tons of respect for. To read her daily living with her kids, homeschooling (which in my book makes her a super-hero), her hubby (my hubby's Irish-brother... or something like that, right? hehe) just her personality... makes me realize that we are all mothers, and parents doing the very best we can with what we got. and that's really all that we can do. :-)

flashback friday

I've been inspired by my long-time friend Bridget to post a photo from 'back in the day' (which was a Friday by the way, hehe). In honor of my friend, I thought my very first flashback friday foto would be of her and I...

circa June 1996 (right before c/o 1996 aka our boyfriend's High School Graduation).

one little word *Keep

*sunday sunday...

I love the days when the weather is perfect, not too cool, not too hot, when all the neighbors are outside visiting...

the kids are playing (nicely) together...
the men (boys) are in the street playing football...

of course, after the Cardinals beat out the Cowboys! WooHoo!!

i want to be..........

as i thought,

in my small circle of life, my kids, my family, my friends...
i want to be peaceful.


as i thought,

of my circle of ethnic, mexican-american...
i want to be peaceful.


as i thought,

of my religion, christianity...
i want to be peaceful.


as i thought,

of my nation, the united states of america...
i want to be peaceful.


as i thought,

of my world, the earth...
i want to be peaceful.


how do i achieve that......



how do WE acheive that................................

Idealist.

go HERE!
Idealists, as a temperament, are passionately concerned with personal growth and development. Idealists strive to discover who they are and how they can become their best possible self -- always this quest for self-knowledge and self-improvement drives their imagination. And they want to help others make the journey. Idealists are naturally drawn to working with people, and whether in education or counseling, in social services or personnel work, in journalism or the ministry, they are gifted at helping others find their way in life, often inspiring them to grow as individuals and to fulfill their potentials.
Idealists are sure that friendly cooperation is the best way for people to achieve their goals. Conflict and confrontation upset them because they seem to put up angry barriers between people. Idealists dream of creating harmonious, even caring personal relations, and they have a unique talent for helping people get along with each other and work together for the good of all. Such interpersonal harmony might be a romantic ideal, but then Idealists are incurable romantics who prefer to focus on what might be, rather than what is. The real, practical world is only a starting place for Idealists; they believe that life is filled with possibilities waiting to be realized, rich with meanings calling out to be understood. This idea of a mystical or spiritual dimension to life, the "not visible" or the "not yet" that can only be known through intuition or by a leap of faith, is far more important to Idealists than the world of material things.
Highly ethical in their actions, Idealists hold themselves to a strict standard of personal integrity. They must be true to themselves and to others, and they can be quite hard on themselves when they are dishonest, or when they are false or insincere. More often, however, Idealists are the very soul of kindness. Particularly in their personal relationships, Idealists are without question filled with love and good will. They believe in giving of themselves to help others; they cherish a few warm, sensitive friendships; they strive for a special rapport with their children; and in marriage they wish to find a "soulmate," someone with whom they can bond emotionally and spiritually, sharing their deepest feelings and their complex inner worlds.
Idealists are relatively rare, making up no more than 15 to 20 percent of the population. But their ability to inspire people with their enthusiasm and their idealism has given them influence far beyond their numbers.
Idealists at WorkIdealists, as a temperament, are passionately concerned with personal growth and development. They are naturally drawn to working with people and are gifted with helping others find their way in life, often inspiring them to grow as individuals and to fulfill their potential both on, and off, the job.
Your attention is naturally drawn to the individual and collective needs, desires, and experiences of people in your environment. In your ideal job, you would be able to use your inner beliefs as a guide for empowering others. Though you are comfortable with leadership, you don’t like arbitrary hierarchies. You care deeply about people as people, and often feel that maintaining official role boundaries interferes unnecessarily with both communication and progress.

*close to a personal day...

The skies are overcast here in Arizona.

The kids are at my parents house watching movies and spending quality time.

Paul is at the tattoo shop with his mother and sister (his mother is 50 today, and is getting a tattoo of the Claddagh and his sister is getting the same, but smaller).

I'm drinking Spiced Chai Latte and Smart Water.

I'm snackin' on some yummy Yogurt Covered Raisins.

I'm listening to 'Singers and Standards' on Music Choice.

And, I've been scrapbooking the majority of the morning.

I plan to paint some pieces for the house, and make yummy chocolate covered pretzels.

Without asking, I've been granted a Personal Day... it's funny how things just seem to work out when you need it most. :-)

*be jealous... very Very jealous...

Because *tonight, I get to see them (without Steve Perry, of course, but with a killer-kick-butt Asian man who sounds just like him! hehe)

the news and the weather...

Well, first and foremost I want to let everyone know that I *greatly appreciate the thoughts and prayers. They really have helped lift my spirits!

As you can imagine, times are a bit tough.

The good news... all of Daddy's testing (more specifically his bone marrow testing) came back with positive results. The cancer seems to be in the blood (truly, I'm just relaying what I've been told, I have no clue the medical details or teminology of it all). We were told, that if you *had to get cancer, this would be the kind to get. Speaking of, I didn't think I've mentioned the name (do we need to que the intro music, hehe... humor people, it's one of the only things keepin' me going). Non-Hotchskins Lymphoma / Low Grade Folicular Lymphoma. I don't know which is which and what is what (in other words, I didn't google it for fear of diagnosing and terminating my father in my fearfilled thoughts). I do know that it is treatable, and said to even be curable.

The not-so-good news... I don't know if those statistics (treatable/curable) are for healthy elderly men. Daddy is 65 with Congestive Heart Failure, Chronic Kidney Disease, Diabites, Low Digioxin, High Potassium, Anemia... thinking... yeah, I think that's it. Not your tri-athelon, but one rock of man, in spirit. Okay, deep breathe... here goes. Daddy will start chemotherapy. Next Thursday. One treatment every three weeks for six treatments. Deep, cleansing breathe. This is a pro-active response, and the type of chemo doesn't affect the heart or kidneys. But, we still have a whole list of precautions. So. That's where we're at.

I'm a boat-load of mixed emotions. There's half of me that I can feel growing stronger into a grown up (ick, hehe) but into an adult, where I can handle things of great magnitude, like a parent dying. Then there is the other half of me, that still feels like the little girl, crawling up in her Daddy's lap, the most loving and secure place ever felt. Ugh, great... bawling! That's all it takes.

Okay... new subject! haha. (I can't keep boring you with my tears and feelings and such. haha. No really, today I just cant share. But one day, maybe.)

So, new subject. Finally, after a cracked screen (growing wider by the day) and a 7 minute life-span on my battery, I got rid of my piece-of-poo cell phone and got the New Voyager from Verizon. It's my new little present to myself. hehe. In all honesty, I felt it necessary to answer calls from your kids teachers wanting to know if the kids are riding the bus home or not, except the cell phone is dead, and you don't get the message til later, making you feel like a total rotten parent. Yeah, worth the expense in my mind. hehe

*golden weekend...

So, this past Wednesday (9/10/2008) was Courtney's *Golden birthday, meaning she turned 10 on the 10th. It was a Big one for her because it was her *golden birthday, but also because she is now 'double-digits'... wow, ten years went by all too quickly. Hard to believe.

We spent the evening out to dinner at Denny's... it's too funny how all the kids, mine and my sisters, love to spend their birthdays at Denny's.

Saturday was the Big party. Courtney and 7 of her closest friends were chauffered off in a

big pink limosine to Sweet and Sassy for a 'Runway Party'. As soon as the limo door opened they walked the red carpet into the store where they had their hair and make-up glammed up, nails painted, dressed up, and walked down the runway, 'striking-a-pose' at the end. They danced, and sang, did cheers, ran around the girly store... a 10 year old's dream come true! (and maybe even a 28 year olds, hehehe).

Aside from the birthday excitement, Friday night, at the monthly scrapbooking crop that I host, we were visited by this little guy. Yep. That's a true Arizona Diamondback Rattlesnake. Quite the excitement, Paul and a neighbor came over to the community clubhouse (walking distance from my house) and caught this snake for a 'snake-proofing' trainer (a person who snake-proofs dogs) who just happen to be scrappin' that night.

All in all, a very productive and fun weekend. I worked on the new mini-book I got from Leigh-Ann, but pictures to come perhaps next post. :)

Take Care, and Enjoy Life!!!

I had to share this...

I was in tears. I still am.
Very touching.

just what i needed...

LeighAnn from Freckled Nest came to the rescue! :) Obviously, I've been on quite a roller-coaster of emotions (and the creativity is certainly nil). I purchased this mini-book kit, and it came in the mail just in time! I was just about ready to hang up my paper cutter and adhesives. So a HUGE 'Thanks' back to ya LeighAnn!

On the sidenote, I'm okay. The family is okay. We are taking things one day at a time. Learning new things every day. Life seems so much more fragile these days. When we have a definite prognosis, I will keep you informed. For now, prayers are needed. Believe me, they help tremendously!

...august...

21st - My 28th Birthday

22nd - My Surprise Birthday Party (thank you Michelle and Kim)

23rd - I found out my Daddy has Cancer.

First Day Of School

Well, here they are. I can't believe I have a 5th Grader and a 3rd Grader! Where did the time go. Big thank you to Grandma (my mom) for the new school clothes... they're definitely stylin'! hehe

today...

Crepes, originally uploaded by tiarafoto.

of all the days of the week i wish i would have had crepes and berries.
"If you really want something you can figure out how to make it happen" - Cher

lookie what i'm up to

I learn-ed to join photos in photoshop. hehe (that was an hour process).

This morning Sissy made Belgium Waffles for us.

Last night I came home (after my crop) to these beautiful Sunflowers (my favorite) on the nice-clean-kitchen table.

Speaking of last night, and crops and scrapbooking and all that is inspring and creative, I actually got some things done. See...

(okay, so the third layout was actually started in 2005, but I never liked it and was gonna re-do it, but decided, eh, just get 'er done! hehe)

I'm so excited to be rubbin' up on my mojo (gotta wine and dine it first, before I can officially call it *mine again, hehehe). Keep your fingers crossed for more to come. hehe

it really is the best policy...

Honesty, originally uploaded by mayotic.

"Honest hearts produce honest actions" ~Brigham Young

Living in the light and being true to myself and honest with all is the road I have finally chosen.

*monday mosaic

1. Love Hurts 2. Birthday Party 3. Mistress Fitness 4. sei tu il mio pastore 5. F1, 6. 7. Astromechs 8. cores!, 9. A Long Road Ahead 10. Krýsuvíkurkirkja, 11. the lights 12. Queer Eye 13. You're" My Heart ... You're My Soul_GD_DSC_3496, 14. Kinetic 1037, 15. _MG_4622 , 16. In The Shade 17. Jennifer's" Rope Flowers, 18. Narcisus, 19. tabula rasa, 20. Pref ID, 21. Sparklers, 22. Obsession, 23. Strip Poker , 24. caddy 25. a lil rust 26. so much time gets lost in my mind 27. Love Me Do 28. High Heels in Thailand 29. Regreso...:(, 30. Detail of Assumption 31. How Do You Afford Your Rock and Roll Lifestyle 32. Maschera Rossa, 33. Downtown Amsterdam 34. Untitled, 35. wind and rain 36. Carnival Sky

"J" and Passion

Lookie-lookie what I got done. hehe. another paining, with some embellies. it was fun, definitely something in progress for a while (you know how real-life just gets in the way. hehehe) so any way. here it is, on the 'J' wall already. I actually quite like it.

In others news...

I also got

<--------THIS done.

Something for my Quote Book. Yay for me! hehe

It's been a nice weekend so far.

Cleaning and laundry are taking place, creativity is in the works... my GirlFriend SuzyQ will be here any second (from CA) and we're gonna chill at the pool (it's only like 110 degrees today. hahaha)

Hope your weekend/the 4th was fabulous!

xoxo

drrrty 30

We had a *blast! Lot of fun, friends, sun, drinks, and gambling. All good times.
Layouts to come! hehehe