2016 Recap

Well, 2016 was quite a year. I didn't blog much (obvi) but so many things did happen in my life. 

January | I became an iPad owner. I moved to a different Crossfit Box (where my husband was). I had an MRI done on a spot found in my lung. I went to Laughlin with the Hubs to meet up with some Nebraska peeps. Cameron started driving practice.

February |  I went to see my favorite musical, Carousel. I participated in the Crossfit Open and got my first and consecutive next nine Chest to Bar pullups. 

March | I was the sickest I have ever been in my entire life. Basically bed ridden and unable to function for nearly two weeks. It was awful, especially because I missed our friends wedding (and I love weddings). Also went to the Nascar race, and celebrated 17 years of marriage with the Hubs. Probably the funnest thing of the year, we took the kids to Cancun. It was the most incredible family vacation. We are so incredibly blessed. 

April | Courtney and I drove back home to Cali for our new nephew's baby shower. Then I met up with my BFF Steph in Laughlin for our annual girl trip. 

May | The hubs was so incredibly good to me, taking me up to Sedona (one of my favorite places ever). The kids went to Prom (Cameron's first, Courtney's last). My sweet nephew was born so we went back to Cali for a visit. And we celebrated Cameron turning 16.

June | Work was busy, especially running the office by myself. Courtney and I went up to Flagstaff for a two day orientation at NAU. That was so exciting. We also celebrated our other nephew's first birthday. Perhaps the biggest news for June, Paul finally got new sunglasses for Fathers Day. Oakleys.

July | All the work, all the work, all the work. Also, was asked to be the leader of our Hospitality Team at church. Unfortunately we also had crisis team at our home to help us deal with, well, family crisis. Don't worry, everything is Ok.

August | Cameron got his license. Courtney dyed her hair, and moved away. She went off to college, and while we were thrilled, it took the rest of the year to adjust to living. Thankfully, the Hubs was brilliant at distracting me by taking me to Sedona. 

September | Had a fabulous "Girls Day" with my Mama at the Omni Resort and Spa. I started bible journaling. We had family weekend in Flagstaff.

October | I spent many days at my Mom's cleaning out the office. We had a charity event for Dougie to beat cancer. Went to several Cardinal games. Went to a Halloween party as the couple from Beetlejuice when they try and scare away the new owners. We also celebrated Paul's Great-Aunt's 90th birthday!

November | Spent two whole days on a shopping spree with my Mama where I bought myself many new articles of clothing, and three new pairs of boots. (I never shop for myself). We held a Charity poker tournament for Doug. Went to the theatre with my Mom. Best of all, I spent an entire "Girl's Weekend" in San Francisco and Napa. It was pretty much the highlight of my year. On top of that... I was fortunate enough to see Adele in concert. We finished out the month with having Dana and our new nephew come visit for Thanksgiving, and took some beautiful family photos.

December | At the beginning of this crazy busy month, Mom and I went down to Tempe and had a delicious dinner on Mill Ave at La Bocca, then rode in a bike shuttle to ASU Gammage to see Mama Mia. About a week later, I was fortunate to attend the 2016 K-Love Christmas with my friend Amanda where I got to see my favorite Christian band, Crowder, perform. I drove up to NAU and brought Sissy home for the holidays! Spent an incredible night with my CFBF Jess where we dined at Southern Rail, then came home and watched Christmas movies while sipping on Peppermint White Russians. All the Christmas decorating, gift wrapping and parties happened. the hospitality group hosted a Hot Chocolate Bar (along with Coffee, Water, and Hot Apple Cider) for 3 Christmas Eve services at church. And then, Christmas came and went per usual, all too fast. 

So many great celebrity losses this year, and many personal struggles for myself as a mother, a woman, and future business owner. Suffice to say, I am ready to pack up 2016 and start the New Year with a fresh breathe!!

shopping spree

As I hinted in previous posts, I've had a rough year (actually a rough almost two years). So many changes have occurred in my life, and I do not do change very well. I have struggled more than I'd like to admit to myself or anyone else. I've had good days and bad days, and then really terrible horrible days. But through it all, I've gotten up and faced the day and its challenges. I have worked hard, incredibly hard. That is something I am proud of; it's something that makes me feel like I'm making my Dad proud, I'm keeping my promises to him and staying on that grind. 

Well, suffice to say that I've worked myself right into a bit of a run down. Stress and tears and heartbreak and pain and worry and all those negative feelings that I just don't do well with took over and it was like hitting a brick wall. I literally was on my knees praying for some help. 

And then, this happened.

I was given two mandatory days off of work, and told to go shopping and spend some money on myself (something I very rarely do). I called my Mama, and to the shopping malls we went.

No alarm clocks, no schedule, no worries or stresses or heartache. Just pure Me time. Talk about prayers answered!! What a blessing! 

I really struggled to post about this. I don't mean to come across gloating or righteous in any way. I want this to be an acknowledgement to those who don't understand or don't believe, Prayer works! I wholeheartedly believe that. Prayer for something simple, or something extraordinary and everything in between. God is absolutely listening. He knows each of our desires and our needs. It takes a faithful person to trust Him, and I do. 

Forgiveness

I am a lover. I love people. I love to love people. I love so deeply, especially my family, and those friends who I consider family. Being such a deep lover unfortunately leaves you susceptible to deep hurt and deep pain. And that, my friends, is the wave I've been riding for some time now.

It's heartbreaking when someone you've given your life to causes you pain. It's almost unbearable. But when it becomes more than one person causing you such pain, for completely different reasons, it absolutely is unbearable. You wake up in a dark depression that makes you wonder what the point of getting up is. You question every decision you ever made in your relationship with these people; you even begin to question your own self-deciding abilities. Ie, if more than one person has caused me this pain, maybe I am the problem, not them. So guilt just smears an ugly layer on top of that depression sealing your ability to see any light in the day, let alone breathe. It's been dark my friends. It's been gut wrenching and soul searching bad. It's been a very long few months. 

Per usual, I turned to my coping techniques, and I barricaded myself, until I became uncomfortable.  And just like the other hellish holes of depression I've been in, I began to see light. I began to seek light. I knew that a change needed to happen. I needed to find the strength to change. So that is where I currently am. 

I know that I can not change the past, I can not change the things that have happened to cause me this pain, nor can I control it. All I can do is wake up each day, make the best decisions I can, pray, and seek the light. 

So do not fear, for I am with you; do not be dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you; I will uphold you with my righteous right hand. -Isaiah 41:10 

Peace I leave with you; my peace I give you. I do not give to you as the world gives. Do not let your hearts be troubled and do not be afraid. -John 14:27

Currently : February

Eating: So, I started a new meal plan with my new gym. After being 100% Paleo 80% of the time... for the past 3 years, I am now eating.... drumroll... carbs!! As in Brown and White Rice and even better, Steep Cut Oats. Yassss!! I'm not mad at it. I'm learning more about my body, and the importance of macros. It's just so wonderful. And another huge plus is I get to eat Chipotle every 4 days!!!! eeeek!   

Enjoying: Naps, Quietness in my office, my Gym time, Glides with my frands, Driving into work with a stunning AZ sunrise, and the general AZ weather in February (you can't be mad at it). 

Excited for: PRs!! Deadlifted 250 this month... that is a 25# Personal Record from 2013 (my previous heaviest lift), Cornhole tournaments, Weddings, and The Crossfit Opens!!

Learning: All about Macros, and about getting into college (so many steps, ugh), and about depression and how to help those with it.

Loving: The hype and the inspiration that comes along with the upcoming Crossfit Open, Sunday mornings at church (Cody Deevers has been killin' the sermon game), and the weather. (Did I already say that, lol). 

Reading: The same as last month (I'm a slow reader)... Drums of Autumn (Outlander Series Book 4), and my daily devotional Jesus Calling. I recommend both. Also hoping to pick up a few Crossfit Magazines before vacation.

Thinking: About vacation, gotta get my base tan on. Also thinking about ways to spend more quality time with my babes, teenagers aren't really into Mom time, but I so desperately need it. 

Watching: Still catching up on Game of Thrones, and up to date on Downton Abbey, the Final Season (tear), but also became ridiculously addicted on Netflix to The Great British Baking Show... seriously, I want to watch it all over again. Paul Hollywood is my old bossman, Sig's doppleganger, like legit!

Currently: January

Eating: I'm completely smitten with Ezekiel Cinnamon toast with crunchy peanut butter for breakfast. With the chilling weather we've been having, I made a huge batch of White Chili (a wintertime staple around my house) and tried a new recipe with the produce I got from Fury Farm, some delicious Leek and Sweet Potato Soup. 

Enjoying: Hot tea in the evenings, working daily on my mobility (something I've decided to dedicate my time to), snuggling and smooching my chunky baby nephew, and listening to Adele's trilogy of albums... I adore her!

Excited for: An unexpected turnaround trip to Laughlin to surprise a friend, more day trips to Flagstaff, to get our bearings before Courtney starts at NAU, and Rush Club 007 to cheer on my friend, Kennedy.

Learning: More about holistic approaches to health. I'm always learning to trust God in all things (not so easy, for someone who likes control), and I'm also learning new skills and techniques in the gym.

Loving: My new crossfit gym and making new friends. Also loving my Arizona Cardinals... big game this weekend. And how could I forget, I am loving the new bench my mom bought me for Chirstmas... it sits at the base of my bed and makes it so much easier to put on my shoes and socks (it's the little things in life). 

Reading: Drums of Autumn (Outlander Series Book 4), and my daily devotional Jesus Calling. I recommend both.

Thinking: About vacation. So much to do before we all leave, this is a big one for all four of us and there is so much preparation. Clothes, money, passports, planning excursions, confirming flights and rooms, etc all for one week of hopeful perfection. Fingers crossed, it will be a vacation to remember.

Watching: Even though we recently got DirecTv, I'm still not glued to my tv. I prefer Netflix and HBO Go, lol. Currently watching Season 7 of Parks and Recreation, and catching up on Game of Thrones with the Hubs (what an exciting show). 

One Little Word : 2016

Can you believe it's here already... 2016... the New Year!!
And you know what that means...
Time to pick this year's One Little Word.

In the past I've chosen words that reflect my intentions for my family, and my position as a mother. Protect, Awareness, Keep, Positivity. This year rings true to much of the same. It might surprise you, it might not. My OLW for 2016 is...

Pray

While this very much could have been the last 6 months of 2015, I've decided to make it my focus for 2016.

Why?

With all that is happening in the world, the death and destruction, the anger and hate, it is a scary time to live.
I'm just one person...with a worldly problem, what can I do to help?
I can pray.

There are so many friends and family members currently being affected by tragic events such as cancer, murder, and suicide.
I'm just one person... with such tragedy, what can I do to help?
I can pray.

Within my immediate family, we have been through troubling and trying times. Times that will test our hearts, letting go of old and swallowing new.
I'm just one person...with more times tested on the horizon, what can I do to help?
I can pray.


In this last year I have been down on my knees talking to God more times that I ever had before. I foresee that will increase as I hope 2016 will find answers and acceptance for so many who surround my world.

My prayer for you... is that you find all the things you so richly deserve in 2016. I pray that you find peace, and love. This might sound general and hallmark'y (yes, I made that up... Jen-ism) but I truly mean it. I want those I love to be deeply grateful for this beautiful life and ultimately happy with the gifts we are given daily. Simple gifts life the sun shining, being able to talk to our parents or siblings, loving our children, food in our bellies.