i know life is not fair...

(and i apologize in advance if i offend anybody here... but i have got to get this off my chest)


There are people in this world that simply abuse the right, and the privilege to have children. To impregnate to become pregnant is first and foremost a responsibility... to that child, to yourselves, to human-kind. It makes my head spin to think of all the unwanted pregnancies, some leading to unwanted babies, others to abortion. Or the irresponsible people who continue to abuse drugs and alcohol during pregnancy. I get so irritated with these people who don't put their children, their pregnancy... the most important thing in life (as far as I'm concerned) their first and only priority.
On the other side... there are people, who love each other whole-hearted, who are good and decent people... who follow all of life's rules... deserving people... who have to go through some of the most physically and emotionally painful things in life to try and bring a new life into this world. My heart breaks for these people. To watch someone you love go through the trials and tribulations of trying to conceive... some couples try for years and years. 
I feel so helpless. I want to make things right. I want to create the miracles that I've been praying so long for. I want to say with nothing but certainty that everything will be alright and that you will get what you deserve.
But I can't. And it sucks. I have so much pain and sadness in my heart. 
I believe in a God who has created miracles. A God who has made the impossible possible. This is all the faith and confidence I have, and all I know how to do is hold onto that and continue to pray.
The son will come out... tomorrow...


Gina said...

I couldn't agree with you more. It just doesn't make sense.

The Gustafson Family said...

Jen..I too couldn't agree with you more. Unfortunately I am on the deserving but nothing happens side. I have spent 40k+ on fertility treatments with no results. And then I know plenty of individuals who "didn't want another one"...so frustrating, pain wrenching, and trying. All I can do is pray to that God of miracles. I know he can do miracles as my Alison is pure prduct of that! Only he knows!!

Jessica said...

I completely agree with you. My husband and I have been married for almost a year and waiting to have children. If it was up to me ... we would have kids now (but he really wants to wait 4 more years). I find myself crying and wondering if I will be able to have children or not (I watch a lot of baby shows and get very emotional). Children and motherhood is such a blessing that I hope someday I will experience it.

♥ Jessie

© something Big is coming...
Maira Gall